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Batman: We talked about this, Cat. No dumb, white baby names.

Cat Woman: It’s what alllllllll the white people are doing now. Let’s call it Ceviche.

Batman: We’re not calling our child Ceviche.

Cat Woman: Crème Fresche?

Batman: No.

Cat Woman: Colby Jack?

Batman: It’s a child, not cheese.

Cat Woman: How about Feta? I LIKE FETA!

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TWO HOURS LATER …

Cat Woman: Let’s combine two names. Like Brian and Regan. Brogan.

Batman: Cathy and Bruce. Cath-uce. Brathy.

Cat Woman: I LOVE BRATHY!

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Batman: Hey, Riddler! Have you seen my new product? It’s called Batsoap! Because kids need soap, and kids like me, so—

Riddler:—Riddle me this: what’s black, gold, sudsy and doomed to fail?

Batman: That’s so mean—

Riddler:—Bat. Soap.

Batman: You’re a dead man.

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Batman: Cancel whatever we have scheduled today.

Robin: Why?

Batman: We’re doing a drone strike on Riddler.

Robin: Whaaaat? Those are unethical. Look at all the heat Obama is taking for—

Batman: —RIDDLER MOCKED BATSOAP.

Robin: Say what?

Batman: You heard me.

Robin: … Someone’s gonna die today.

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Batman: See that blue panel?

Robin: Yep.

Batman: See the button that says “Drone?”

Robin: Yep.

Batman: Press it.

Robin: Done.

Batman: I already entered in Riddler’s address, so we’re good.

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Man Bat: Thanks again for having me over, Riddler.

Riddler: Anytime, man! Thanks for looking at my manuscript.

Man Bat: Are you kidding? That’s a helluva book you got there!

Riddler: Seriously?

Man Bat: I’d say you’ve got two more drafts. Once those are done, we ship it to my editor.

Riddler: I love it, I love it, I love it!

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Riddler: Look out, Man Bat! Look out!

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Robin: We killed Man Bat, not Riddler!

Batman: Damn … Where was Riddler?

Robin: Right next to Man Bat.

Batman: (after ten seconds of silence) Whatever, Man Bat’s homophobic.

Robin: WAS.

Batman: Ba-zinga! 

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Wonder Woman: Seriously Cat, I would love to run your bridal-shower-slash-baby-shower.

Cat Woman: I don’t know, it just seems like you’re not that interested.

Wonder Woman: Whaaaat? That’s the pregnancy hormones talking, sister. No way. I’m … psyched.

Cat Woman: Would you care to take the lasso test?

Wonder Woman: I’d take the test, but I left the lasso at my condo.

Cat Woman: Hmm. Fascinating.

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Cat Woman: Do you really want to run my bridal-shower-slash-baby-shower? TELL THE TRUTH!

Wonder Woman: I don’t want to run the shower! But I will because I feel obligated!

Cat Woman: Hell, I can work with that.

Wonder Woman: Where did you get my goddamn lasso!

Cat Woman: I STOLE IT.

Wonder Woman: WHY?

Cat Woman: BECAUSE I’M A THIEF.